Strength in Facing the Unknown

"If God sends us on strong paths we are provided strong shoes." --Corrie TenBoom

You may not believe it right now, but you have the strength to get through this pregnancy. You CAN cope with the anxiety this new pregnancy brings. You CAN cope with the physical and emotional toll that it may take upon you as the weeks and months progress. If you have the unfortunate experience of suffering another miscarriage, you WILL survive it. The odds are in your favor that you will have a healthy pregnancy this time; however, there are some of us who have had a few miscarriages in a row. It is devastating--there is no question about that...but you will survive. You have "stronger shoes" than you realize--this is true for all of us.

Try to remember that if what you imagine to be the "worst case scenario" occurs with this pregnancy for you and your mate--if you can't get pregnant again, or you continue to have problems carrying your baby to term--you CAN still have a family. After three miscarriages, I had to come to terms with this possibility. If we continued to suffer losses, we could use a surrogate/gestational carrier, adopt children, or become foster parents...we were determined to have a bigger family and would reach that goal somehow. Once I realized that we would eventually have the family of our dreams, I felt more peaceful. I had to get real and alter what my dream could look like.

What are your strengths that help carry you through this exciting, yet fearful, time? What are your partner's strengths that are helpful to you? Reflect upon the challenges that you've faced in your life--previous losses, traumatic experiences, sad goodbyes, illness that you've conquered, relationship disappointments. Having a miscarriage often brings up previous losses and hurts in your life. How have you coped during hard times? Draw upon those strengths to help get you through the anxiety right now. Remember that you have coped with pain and uncertainty in the past and you can do it again. It will be well worth it when you are holding your precious baby in your arms.

Please help me to remember that I am strong and brave. This is a challenging journey that I am on, but not an impossible one. There are many women, and couples, who have endured miscarriages and have gone on to have healthy children. I have faith that this will happen for me. Help me to use difficult experiences from my past to help me cope here in the present. Help me to remember that I will realize my dream of becoming a parent or a parent to more children.