Evaluating Happiness

"Happiness is not about successes...it is about feeling significant." --Dr. Robert Holden, Happiness Researcher and psychologist

So many of us fall into thinking that we will be happy...if we have a bigger house, if we find a husband, if we get a raise, or if we can have a baby. It is easy to fall into this way of thinking, striving, comparing in today's competitive world. It seems there is always someone right next to us that is smarter, more fit, wealthier, more outgoing, more fertile, and the list goes on. It is time to take a step back from this way of thinking--and challenge yourself. Do achievements make you happy? Do material things make you happy? Do successes make you happy?

All achievements/successes/material items can temporarily life anyone's spirits. However, true happiness comes from the inside of one's soul--a truly happy person is satisfied with themselves and their life, regardless of recent accumulations/successes. Truly content people are also able to persevere and maintain their optimistic vantage point, even after tragedy strikes.

For this week, reflect upon happiness and the role it plays in your life--and how your outlook on life will affect your coming baby. Take a moment to think about these five questions, called The Satisfaction With Life Scale, developed by Ed Diener at the University of Illinois. Rank each item from 1-7 in your mind (1=not at all true, 7=absolutely true).
1. In most ways, my life is ideal.
2. The conditions of my life are excellent.
3. I am satisfied with my life.
4. So far I have gotten the important things I want in life.
5. If I could live my life over, I would change almost nothing.

What did you learn about yourself? The higher your total score, the happier you are. How do you think your feelings about yourself and outlook on life will affect your mothering and new baby? How are you significant? If you don't feel significant, how can you develop this area of your life?

For this week, please help me to slow down and evaluate how much happiness I feel in my life. If I am not feeling happy or satisfied with my life--and am expecting this baby to complete me--please help me to being understanding that this will not occur. The baby will likely fill me with happiness and joy, but also many other emotions along the way. The baby will come out of my womb with its own needs...not to meet my needs for happiness and fulfillment. Ultimately, no one except myself can make me feel happy. Help me to discover that warm part of my soul where I feel safe, confident, and joyful about life.