Optimism

"Life is never beyond hope." --Rudolfo Anaya, BLESS ME ULTIMA

Our thinking affects our feelings and behavior--just as our feelings affect the way we think about experiences. However, we tend to have more control over our thought processes than mastery over controlling our emotions. It is extremely common to have a negative tape running through our minds all day long--an inner critic calling ourselves names and making us feel badly about ourselves. After a pregnancy loss, it is not uncommon to be distraught, down, or experience depressing thoughts. However, to wallow in this negative thinking for too long will only make one feel worse about the situation. Time is a good healer for this negative thinking--and a subsequent pregnancy is a good positive distraction.

There is one silver lining of miscarriage and that is the opportunity to try and get pregnant again. There was hope that you would get pregnant again--and you DID--and now there is hope that you will carry this baby to term. I know it is a guarded hope since you've experienced a loss...but it is sill hope. It is a precious gift to be pregnant again and one that is worth relishing for a few moments today. There is actually a lot to be said for having an optimistic attitude to help you cope with the stress of a first trimester.

What negative thoughts cross your mind each day? How are these thoughts affecting your feelings? Is it time to think more positively? It is important for the baby to feel your faith and hope for this pregnancy--you can start to do this by letting more light and hope into your mind and heart. It is time to make room for the baby growing inside of you and let go of some of the negativity that has been following you around. You have had a set-back, a misfortune by having a miscarriage--but now you have also been blessed. It's so much more relaxing and soothing to focus on the current blessings present in your life.

Help me to slow down today and recognize the power of my thinking upon my feelings throughout the day. Help me to treat myself kindly and stop berating myself in every way. Help me to quiet the negative voice in my head that creates more anxiety in me about this pregnancy. Allow me to focus on the positive things happening in my life this very moment--and begin to allow the hope to seep in in manageable moments. I am scared to be too optimistic and hopeful, yet I want to begin allowing positive feelings in.